Saturday, September 7, 2024

We lost Fleurp and Twee within two weeks of each other (and pretty major TFK news)


 

This post is breaking my heart.. If your heart is too sensitive for Fleurp and Twee's story, you can scroll down to the last paragraph where it says "Major News" which I put in bold.

Fleurp:
Earlier this year, Fleurp was diagnosed with hypothyroidism, so we were giving her medication twice a day to help with that. Her levels weren't going down well so we had a medication increase. She is not an easy cat to tend to as she had many opinions and all of them told her that she absolutely positively did not need my help. She hated when I shaved her each spring to help manage her anemia and she hated it when I started giving her fluids every other week or so as she was old and her kidneys could use the help.. She would react like I was biting her and fight to get away. Even trimming her claws was often an exercise in how much I could do before she lost her patience with me.. (most of the time I got them all done, but not always)

She changed when we moved out of Maine. She was a social cat before, but in the years since moving here she separated herself from us most of the time. In the first house we moved to, she almost never left the mud room/kitchen. She rarely came down the hall to go to bed with us.. Her world became very small.  When we moved into our current house, 90% of her life was the kitchen or living room windows (the two rooms are barely separated with a double door arch way).  She seemed happy and totally content. She liked it when we catered to her desires and gave her "candy bars" often standing on the island demanding them.

She spent 10 years becoming anemic once or twice a year. Mostly in the spring but occasionally in the fall. We aren't sure why but she would have a very dramatic shed from winter to summer and I know a lot of fur can impact nutrient absorption (which is why we did what we could to shave her so she consumed less) but it wasn't perfect. She still had issues.  I knew she would most likely not make it to 20+ years, but I never guessed that her thyroid levels would damage her heart.

It started with diarrhea that was gross and smelly, she stopped eating. I took her in for an exam and tests and more bloodwork. Her liver was seriously compromised. My vet suspected her heart was an issue. I took her home to try to fix what we could but we couldn't. I took her back to the vet (on July 11th), thinking there was more that we could do to pull her though this, but after an exam, it was clear she was suffering. We considered taking her to a specialist for further diagnostics in hopes of finding more answers that we could treat, but knowing Fleurp's willingness to bite, her hatred of traveling and being poked and prodded, and the only slim chance there was a better answer, we opted to let her go.

Was it the "right" call? I have no idea.. but it was one made with a whole lot of love.. we wanted to do right by her.. and we felt it was the right decision at the time, and that is what matters, that is what I hold on to.

Twee: 
Twee does not do well with changes to The Crew. Her first loss was Emmy. She was a young girl then and hardier, and there were many other cats for her to hang out with, but you could tell she spent some time being lost. She and Ollie never really got along (he was far too grumpy for her simple nature) so his passing wasn't as hard. He had been the ruler of The Crew so everyone was a bit lost when he left us, but we didn't notice anything specific with her. When Jack passed, Twee became quite despondent. She ate, but not nearly enough and we almost lost her too. We ended up taking her to an emergency facility, where she spent the weekend (and a lot of money) before she was well enough to come home. 

When Fleurp passed, I had been saying for years that Twee wasn't going to be with us much longer. She was 18, 19, 20 years old and had stage two and then three kidney disease. Before Fleurp started with the diarrhea I noticed that Twee was losing weight and I really didn't like how she was looking so I took her to the vet for some bloodwork to see if there was anything else that might be done. I was kinda hoping it was her thyroid.. but it wasn't. Her kidneys just couldn't do their job and she was feeling miserable.  I tried antinausea and appetite stimulant but it didn't really help all that much. (Sadly, pilling her diminished her quality of life.. with the fluids I know that this life style wasn't that sustainable) and I tried to prep my husband for her eventual end. He was in complete denial. I'm not sure which was worse, Twee at 20 or Kit at 9..  When Fleurp passed, Twee really started to go down hill. I pulled out every single thing I could think of.. 

He wanted to try more things, but I had given it my last ditch effort. I said we could try for a second opinion and he glommed on to that so hard but I explained the chances were that we would put her through more stress to potentially get a short amount of time with her. In the end, he realized that it was time. Thankfully my vet lives right near by and was willing to come to the house.

While we both appreciate not being serenaded by Twee singing opera at 11pm and 3am on a regular basis, they are both missed terribly.  Not only did we lose both cats within two weeks of each other, but going from five cats to three was quite dramatic. 

And to top it all off, we are in the midst of a major life change. The Catman is being transferred from VT to NC. This is something that has been bandied about for a couple of months. What is horrible is that we were so incredibly worried when we moved from ME to this area because Kit was absolutely horrible at traveling by car.. even a 10 minute ride would make her drool horribly for hours. She was a tiny cat and it was really worrisome. When she developed cancer and passed away within a week of diagnosis, part of me was relieved that we didn't have that added stress. Her situation was clear cut. She had a cancerous growth that was incompatible with life. Her inability to travel hindered our ability to get her additional care. I worried about such a huge move with two elderly and medically fragile kitties and wondered what we were going to do.  Part of me yells at myself for "giving up too easily" because of the real potential of moving 12 hours away and not wanting to put either of them through that.  I am sure in time I will forgive myself for making two pretty clearly correct decisions because on another level I'm relieved I don't have that added stress of moving them, but I don't think it will be any time soon.

Major news:
We are going to Raleigh NC for about six months while he is in training, so we are looking for a place to live. We are going to rent a place while he is getting up to speed and then we are going to look for a home and move to Charlotte where his work wants him. This means some serious down sizing and renting a storage unit so we don't have to get rid of EVERYTHING and have to rebuy it in a few months. I am downsizing a lot of my crafting supplies and what not.. it is very very painful for me. I am getting rid of a LOT of my foster supplies since I won't be fostering next year unless he trains quickly and we get into a home faster.  I'm getting rid of a lot of my own cat things because I own far fewer cats and don't see us adding any for at least a year (see the last unless).  A twelve hour move to a two bedroom apartment is a far cry from a 2 hour move to a three (plus) house with a full basement and huge amount of storage (first house - second house had more of both things).  As someone who has attached a lot of emotions to the things I have chosen to own, letting so much go is a really painful process. I am working on giving away what I can't sell, sell what I can, and hopefully it will pare us down enough to be comfortable. but going from an 11 room house to a two bedroom apartment.. yeah.. ouch

15 comments:

  1. Hugs. I've been there and it is never easy regardless of circumstances. It sounds like a lot of stress but know lots of people care about you.

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  2. So sad to hear about Fleurp and Twee. It is always so hard to lose them, and it is always too soon. Moving is such an upheaval, and while North Carolina is truly beautiful, it will be very different for you. But, eventually, you will probably find that there are lots of kittens there that need your expert fostering, even if they meow with a Southern drawl.

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  3. Anonymous10:10 PM

    ((Hugs)) so sorry for your losses, and sympathy for the stress of downsizing for your major moves ahead. I will miss reading your saga of foster kittens and their moms. I hope you’ll be able to foster again in the future.

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  4. That's a lot to deal with in a short amount of time - I'm sorry you're having to deal with readying for a move on top of grieving. ❤️

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  5. I love you, Connie. I hear how hard all of this is for you (and would be for anyone).

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  6. Anonymous12:25 AM

    Sending purrayers and much LoveI saw your mentions of Fleurp and Twee on FB and knew it would take time. Adding in the move just adds more. Glad to hear you plan to still Foster when things settle down.

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous12:34 AM

      This is catladymac. Hadn't realized I was anonymous.

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  7. Kathleen Floyd7:52 AM

    I have been such a fan of you and your blog since I found you back when you were fostering the pair of tabbies (Isaac Arnold (?) and ???) back around 12 years ago, and loved learning about your crew. It was 2014 when you ended up with Maxwell and Farraday (now Ducky) the ‘Siamesey’ brothers and I knew they had to come home to our house to join our family. Following you for all these years allowed me to see just how good you are at what you do. I’ve also watched your losses and it was heartbreaking seeing you lose Jack and now Fleurp and Twee so close together. I especially loved Twee and how she showed such an interest in your fosters. I was always rooting for her to get beyond the door that separated her from the babies but realized you kept everyone safe by keeping them apart.
    I’m feeling especially lucky to have ended up with Honey and Thumper (now Smudge). They are a wonderfully funny and snuggly addition to our family. I hope the move goes as smoothly as possible and that you find the perfect place for you to start up fostering again someday. Sending love 💕 to you and the Catman , Skippy, Tobes and your Worrier Princess. 🥰

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  8. Anonymous11:30 AM

    So sad for all the heartache you have been through!! Wishing you all the best on your move and getting settled!! Take care and hope you keep in touch with us.🥰🩷🙏

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  9. Wow, that's a big move! I admire your fortitude, I've been struggling with moving even an hour away. Charlotte is nice although, technically, you'll now be in THE SOUTH. Still, there's good people there and I have no doubt that you'll find them. Decluttering is HARD but you'll feel so much better afterwards. Best of luck to you & The Catman !

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  10. Oh, Connie. I'm sorry things are hard right now. I love you so much and will be sending positive energy your way. And planning on a trip to Charlotte in a year or so.

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  11. Oh Connie, that's a lot of really hard hits, one right after another. Change is SO hard, even the good kind. And when it comes after heartache like this ... Sending hugs...

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  12. I'm so sorry for the loss of Twee and Fleurp. Losing one is bad enough, but two so close together? There are no words. And good luck with the big changes coming your way. Moving is never easy...so much work. Big hugs.

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  13. My sympathies on the passing of Twee and Fleurp. To lose both of them so quickly had to have been a very emotional time.
    Best of luck in your new home. I hope the cats and you and your DH settle in quickly.

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  14. Connie, we are so sorry to read that you lost both Fleurp and Twee, and so close together. Sending you much love and gentle purrs as you mourn their passings, and also for things to go as smoothly as possible for your big move.

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