Saying goodbye.

Well this one was harder than I expected it to be. Interestingly enough not for the new kittens, I know they will be fine, but for Lena.  I love Lena, I do, but I have known all along she is not my kitty.  So, knowing this, I though I would be sad to bring her back because I love snuggling her and I knew it would be hard on her, but I didn't expect to cry..

Before

After

I know my issue isn't so much her not being with me any more, but the uncertainty of the life she is about to enter.  If I knew where she was going, knew what home, what people, what was there for her, it would be easier for me. Granted I know there are not certainties in life, but will she go home with Glimfeather? will she adjust to her new family, will they adjust to her? will there be snotty kids who won't respect her? Will there be a yappy dog who will harass her?  I just want her to be happy, she has had such a rough life so far.. She has lost everything she has ever known and loved.. (it didn't help that she did not want to be caught this morning and avoided my attempts to get her)

*sigh*

I will write up an adoption card with her history, her likes and her dislikes.. the staff know her story and will adopt her out with those considerations, I can hold on to the fact that they will work to find her a good home.

After leaving her there, my eyes started to tear up driving to work.. the radio was on and I noticed the song that was playing..

I don't need you to worry for me cause I'm alright.. 

this is not the first time a song  has been playing on the radio as I have left the shelter in tears that seemed to be talking to me.  It is pretty amusing too because I so infrequently listen to the radio these days, I tend to listen to books on tape.  After that song came

and I had visions of a 10 yr old me at the roller rink, (seriously check out the link) which for me was some old warehouse type building in the back of an industrial park in the middle of nowhere except it was THE place to go because it really was the only place to go, being so excited this song came on and jumping up and rushing to get out on the floor to skate to it..   It made me smile..

So while I'm weepy today, and probably will be for a bit.. I shall randomly yell out in my mind (not stand up in the office and do it because that would just be weird) REVERSE SKATE! and think of Joan and music from the 80s..